Interesting events the past few days

Well things have not been best for me or my family and pack let’s start with Sophie she was poisoned by a demon which started a shit storm with packs defending us and hunting who did it and elders showed up where I met tera she said I heard you’re looking for another wife maybe I could be your wife I accepted hit lucky we didn’t get married because due to all this the elders called a vote kick all demons out of their world which the elders passed then a faction vote will be called next week

And all political shit like demons had 24hr to leave pack territory or die demons saying they don’t want to leave etc tera was being racist to demons they did kill 13 pups from other packs lucky sophie is ok and well yeah trying to get me to side with her and get rid of my friends then Wolfs pack said no and challenged the elders now there exiled  they still have their powers but no home which has made this whole house very depressed Wolf kicked tera out using my power and started crying and Lexi has not stopped crying it was their home they built so much just to be kicked out I feel the pain too all I built to bridge the gap between humans and them gone now we are caring for Sophie and figuring out a new home which Annas mums like here our property is big enough we can even turn it into a green forest with little stream since one got diverted and all this I think they will take it

But good news  Annas mum is going to teach me to use my powers and is going to open her library to me with books tons of books items with bound spirits not slaves they can go if they wish they help her with magick and also when an in human haunting finding out what it is and how’s to help it the family everyone she said I could do that and is willing to teach me but yeah

Have a good one

Last post what I learnt

1 god does not give a shit about me the dark entity was evil tried to possess me use my power as its own then all the bad shit lead to this moment I have my wives I do class Anna as my wife shut up Wolf Mira lexi three kids Isabella Sophie and Kara and im loved I work with them they help me im still lone Wolf in a way but im part of a pack now something I would never change I love them and I would never put my kids through my torment I will give them the life I never had what helped me when I was a kid chess music art books Wolf

I didn’t know how involved Wolf was she was my angel she helped me I kept talking to her till drugs which broke her heart she knew the real me not that shell of me not dark ben but light ben she chose me from a younge age and did the best she could to help she helped more than she knows someone to talk to so yeah ive learnt more build my code of honor learnt how to be a man there was some stuff I left out like my dad’s  survival training because their posts in of themselves there that long so I want to say this so many times in my life I wanted to die but I kept surviving even after an attempt or two but if I didn’t keep going I would not have my family my wives kids the pack Annas family none of it so all this pain in the end im happy and ive laid these demons to rest and my mum is miserable I know her better than she thinks I study I watch I observe things that’s my strength observation you wont know im there but im watching sp yeah go through the shit things do get better hard still but better trust me

Have a good one

Well my life raw uncensored and its fucked up part 3

Well hell of a journey isn’t it now more abuse my mum stabbing me etc. till I was 13 but my dad’s training as a kid I wanted to die but my dad kept me from doing it after grade six is high school whole new people yet some are the same high school was hell of a ride let’s start with a school fitness camp it was funny I was not in that class the fitness class I focused on sports not hiking school footy rugby cricket baseball and the camp was doing a 3 day hike and I was doing my dad’s training we used same path as them and they were complaining about 10kg on their back little more or less I ran past em 6 times during those three days get up at 4 am went to sleep at 11pm for 4 days with 100 plus kg on my back and 20 kg in each hand I was 13 ish I think turning 14 6 times I ran past them with my dad right next to me then they walked past during a point of ten push ups with 100kg on my back I got back the next week with them talking but all this training like I said in post posts I was training all my life but never this much think of it as 5-13 it was 30% then 13 100% my dad was a warrior SASR tier one special forces and served in Vietnam as SASR it got to the stage where I was highly trained at 14 I had school bullies about 20 of them in a group  saying shit like your weak a tip rat your poor kids shit beating me but I held my fist till start of the year my dad was diagnosed with bowl cancer which moved to his liver and still sick as a dog trained me but I could not take it I took out each bully one by one till the leader was left I knew fighting them all was impossible granted I take few out with me but one by one till they feared coming to school I remember one time two of them were walking behind a set of class rooms and I pulled one silently his make got the end realised his mate was gone ran back found him beaten to a pulp and I was gone watching him tho then the leader was last his fear was great I feed off it dark me was born the thing with me egging me on telling me to feed grow stronger then the leader got beaten so bad that he lived but never came back to school I was strong trained smart highly intelligent I loved chess and I drew but my mum burn everything time and time again called me stupid granted I was not best student but I got 100% on tests anyway I saw life like a chess match and used it as such

I started feeding off pain hate fear mainly fear I loved it I was not proud of what I did then I stabbed a kid with a pencil snapped it almost went to hit his neck and kill him Anna stopped me the only person who truly can matt held me back after that moment of stopping the fear in his eyes but after beating the crap out of teachers a teacher hit me during this time and well he does not teach no more because they said self-defence which was BS I beat him so bad he left on a stretcher his fear as I kept punching him I said recently in past posts of the entity even in this one Anna being the psychic saw my eyes go blacker than night then red like fire they kept changing back and forth she told matt not to touch me because of this he listened but what got me to stop was not anyone I heard a voice crying stop it I love you now at school I had no GF and it was not Anna Wolf said it Anna said she did Wolf said she did it stopped me but Dark ben was strong dangerous ready kinda psychotic

Now my dad died before he died I was in the room before the induced coma to stop pain I was 15 it was before the school year two weeks or so anyway I was there and he said son I love you I wished I could fully protect you from you mum but I respect you after everything you got up and had a smile on you face and was caring deep inside you are no amount of training or bloodshed could change that I love you son and respect you then my mum kicked me out of the room a sat just that the door listening crying then two days later I hear flat line sound I smashed open the door my dad was sitting up still dying but sitting up he looked at me and smiled and I walked out from up in the hills where the palliative care hospital was to Annas house a good 30km I walked I know this sounds corny it was raining a storm came in after a heatwave the norm here and Anna knew before anyone else Wolf told her the second I stepped out of the hospital I kept walking even through red lights I was in shock that my father mentor and best friend was dead  I almost got hit by like 5 cars but kept walking got to Annas she opened the door waiting for me and this was when she wanted me as a Bf I cried in her arms first time she ever saw me cry I stayed with Anna till the Monday my dad’s funeral she sat next to me military gave their honor sect then hung out at the wake I think its called with Anna and Matt free unlimited drinks since the owner knew my dad no booze for us but still hung out I then went home my mother’s abuse no sexual stuff since I could defend myself but emotional psychological abuse

Then I found drugs me and the French teacher smoked pot together with art teacher who we bought off and booze I slept with the teacher this was when I lived by drugs alcohol girls then dropped out became homeless got out back into drugs then car accident then more drugs for a bit then clean then well now

Well my life raw uncensored and its fucked up part 2

Well primary school my past post spoke of matts family and mine saving money to send us to a decent school well primary school prep I was 5 about two to three weeks in we find Anna my light my love my best friend she was being picked on she said that she was psychic teacher thought crazy and got her sent to psychologists teacher gave a damn about her anyway being picked on by a bunch of boys who started hitting her I didn’t know what it was but I felt drawn to help I got matt and we jumped in to help her she said thank you and asked if she could be friends again I was drawn to say yeah and we hung out she said Wolf thanks you first I heard of Wolf this is where I can relate to ken after that it was me vs the world since matt was never truly targeted Anna got left alone a little but me after school beatings etc. teacher again I can relate to ken did not give a two shit flying fuck about me hence I can relate on lone Wolf

After that day abuse still occurred but that’s when I remember feeling someone hold me through every fearful night when I could not sleep after every beating or worse I found out it was Wolf I spoke to her granted didn’t know who it was or if it was anything I talked about everything it helped me granted never got a response but she held me I guess she did really choose me as a mate and was in a relationship with me

Primary school during it my mums third brother my uncle stayed over because my dad was away trying to well put food on the table my uncle Nathan this is very hard to type so bear with me im actually crying about this he well raped me I remember it all lucky he didn’t have std he left me night after night broken I called out to Wolf again didn’t know it was her she held me I cried it happened for two months till he left abuse for me was on and off the two months straight of abuse then 3 months of or a week etc but the off periods was the worse I think the fear that at any moment it could happen I kept talking to Wolf kept feeling her then my dark entity really made its appearance big time my room even my sister felt dread fear anger some was from me other from it and I remember its shadow but when it appeared it had a cheeky little smile with fang teeth but it was not every night I think Wolf fought it a few times  it also was about my height at the time had red eyes like fire claw like fingers I hid in the hallway always peered into my room and came it jumped on me this was the time I really hated the church questioned everything and got banned from attending sermons

Then round 6 months to a year its not exact my uncle died he said before he died of a heart attack or something I forget since I like him dead last few months wrote a note it said im not killing myself I have too much pride but this thing will kill me I know it then he described a Wolf with large fangs fire fur black eyes the size of a car Wolf tells me now it was her she said her rage after rape after rape grew to the point I’ve never seen her like this I can keep going on stuff at school but a lot stayed the same we hung out with Anna I got my ass beat but the turn was in grade 6 school carnival my mother kept my prisoner in the house my dad got me out for sport fishing hunting training and working on cars or sent me to my grandma’s house since my mums side of the family most died by then grandparents or Annas mums place she is more like my mother than my own mother she cared for me and at one point was thinking of being a legal guardian to get me out her and my dad were best friends don’t worry they didn’t have sex and lisa is my sister by blood in spirit she is like matt is my brother  include  but I remember my mum was passed out my sister snuck me out of the house annas mum was waiting at end of the street with her 4WD and I got in with my sister Anna was there she gave me the biggest hug but that’s who Anna is she’s a hugger and said are you excited there will be fireworks there the best I never saw them or been to a school festival that was one of the best times of my life I had fun so much fun I got home and got abused tho after my uncle my mum started doing sexual abuse she force oral sex which is disgusting again hard to talk about but fuck it then last year of primary school my dad taught me fear training to rid myself of it now im a weapon in the dark self-defence even survival training  stealth etc trained like tier one special forces and even more

Again more stick with me

Well my life raw uncensored and its fucked up

Well before I start ken bro you gave me the courage to talk about this man you’re not alone with a fucked up life and yeah I don’t have the pride that holds me back from really opening up anymore it’s something that was needed for me and others and I will repeat things from past posts but there is a thousand times more this might be in parts

Well were to start when my mum was pregnant with me she smoked drank only didn’t do drugs thank fuck she never tried to abort or terminate the pregnancy it’s against my mums religion but its ok if she did it herself she fell down stairs twice on purpose then what caused me to be born she stabbed herself missed me suck it mum  she’s a devout catholic my dad’s Anglican then I was born on 31/10/94 at 9am in Frankston and lived in Frankston north people from here know that’s bad rough area to Angela and Anthony I was youngest of three older eldest sister melody and Adam yes their real names fuck it   my mother said to the doctors get rid of him I don’t want him well we know this my dad said he’s my son were keeping him and they got home a week later my mother tried to kill me smother me in my crib somehow by my mums logic killing a baby is ok with her god a lot of stuff she did goes against her god my dad pretty much raised me alone then I was 6 months my mm threw me an a small pool my dad jumped in to save me and took me to ER

Then last time my dad told me about was giving me well Panadol to cause an overdoes for kids adult Panadol is lethal at times depends on child she gave me a full packet Panadol is like aspirin but different  all before I was one now as I was one to 5 well 20 times she tried to kill me  once was stabbed in the neck lucky she missed all the things important I have the scar another was holding me down in the bath my brother stepped in and saved me another time was she tried to run me over in the street matts mum ran in and saved me my mums like it was an accident matts mum knew it was BS  then at 2 my mum started really abusing me my dad was out trying to find work in other states but my dad cooked for me brought me stuff to wear etc. beatings every day for 3 years my mum tried to kill me more times up to 20 by last count could go higher or lower who knows

Now growing up in Frankston north it’s in the south east of Melbourne last stop before country big place its apart of Frankston as a whole I grew up next to matt only guy ill censor his name because he’s my best mate he is my brother true brother were not blood but he’s my bro and going to be my best man at mine and annas wedding he remembers ambulance being called multiple times me pissing out blood from my mum back then even now cops don’t give a damn never did otherwise my mum would have been reported and in jail but no not the case beating after beating to the point when my dad was home he slept in me and my sisters room but it could not last forever beating after beating my mum actually drugged my dad one night with sleeping pills in his beer my mum was prescription pill addict and she beat me put me in hospital the head of the ER now was a resident back then and now we are actually friends my mum would beat me to near death I don’t remember much not because im blocking it out but being beaten that bad has its toll

Now primary school ill put in part to so stick around

Well a lot has happened in less than 12 hours

Well let’s start with my kids the twins have been born first was Isabella she was born in Wolf form because of me she’s part Wolf she has black fur yellowish gold eyes that’s it then there’s Sophie she’s got grey and white fur with a black nose im so happy before Sophie I was holding Isabella while she gets knowledge which is something I didn’t get with Kara but I didn’t hold her at first they get images of  things history math language other stuff I don’t know I can’t see but memories of all the people important in her life mine annas wolfs miras memories I held her  and then she wanted to play with Kara so we went outside which leads to other thing now what my baby girls said to me daddy I love you when I first saw them

Now the other part today before Mira went into labour we were talking they think I should find two other ladies to fall in love with granted it was a ploy for this I was thinking about it the ladies said it will make our pack stronger and gave me a list of things that they would like me to look for and my own list but this was something that was a ploy I was letting Isabella outside to play and Lexi walked up to me after grabbing Isabella and said I heard you’re looking for another lady could you consider me and blushed she said im not blood to the pack so its ok then she showed me how she felt about me when wolf first presented me to the pack she was jealous and then after she spent time with me and she started to fall for me then did granted ill admit I started falling for her too but did nothing because of the obvious reasons Wolfs adopted little sister but today she asked me I was hesitant but I spoke to Wolf and she said I knew it I wanted it to happen that’s why we said that Mira later said yep she’s perfect the pack knew and were happy when I said yes and accepted my feelings for her  she’s about 500 years old fully grown  she loves video games anime sports and kids

She does not want kids yet thank god I think keeping up with three which as Wolf said class them as adults and kids at the same time they have the intelligence of an adult but the impulsiveness of a kid and look Lexi is also a virgin yeah not my first virgin but the first I cared for deeply so im going to make it special romantic today we were in spare bedroom talking kissing cuddling and yeah tomorrow night Anna is staying in the city for a business thing with her mum Wolf Mira away showing elders the new pups Mira also wants to show her family not blood but looked after her so their gone for the night just me and Lexi im going to make it special for her she’s worth it but she wants to do marriage ritual soon  Wolf could see her love as one of a mate so yeah

Lexi has brown hair emerald green eyes kinda they go red at times but that’s her true for she’s a brown Wolf I’ve got a few pics to kinda help you guys get a picture of her  still does not do her justice

Well things happened some good some bad

Well let’s start Mira is pregnant which is huge news twin girls we have been trying for a little Mira really wants to be a mum she came home around midnight all excited jumping around banging on stuff  jumping on the bed screaming and yeah she told me she’s pregnant twin girls

Now the bad Mira tried to hurt me she was feeling weak loss of energy someone asked to give her energy she said no then that person points out it could hurt the twins and herself I just went up yes do it without her permission it needed to be done and I’d do it again but she went into a rage it took a while for her to calm down I thought she’d try to kill me

Saying ill chock you and then rip your spine out etc all because of this it took a little bit of time for her to calm down come to her senses then she cried she remembered who I was and all that so I spent the rest of the day holding her she feels really bad about it but no need I’d do it again and pull her out if I have too anyway real quick post

Have a good one

My dark side + updated

Well lets again start with Kara she’s getting better running around still scared of most things her claws and teeth are growing back thank god for that people caught tortured and executed so yeah

Well yesterday I don’t remember most of it I remember red people on kik said I snapped Mira said my whole body changed it was not me Mira said I thought in past life I thought you weren’t human and its confirmed and I ask people and I know what I am now thanks to friends and me and Mira are working together to use its power for good and control it not fall into darkness again Mira Wolf Anna and Kara were scared my ladies snapped me out of it and I don’t remember anything except red I was not possessed I was me Mira and Wolf know that and now use my power

Which first of many sessions with Mira I feel like I’ve been hit by a truck and at a point like my skin was on fire funny thing im more powerful than Mira but she’s older and wiser than me our first session Anna’s mum felt the energy and is freaking out calling everyone she knows to figure out more things about my race to help me but yeah that’s all sort post I know im tired also to ken I got the message of your dream loud and clear bro

Have a good one

Updates and dreams and a vision

Let’s start with Kara with a lot of healing she is getting better ear still can move claws are not grown there’s a little bit of pain but considering she is doing better she’s giggling trying to fight bath time sleeping better but the mental stuff will begin soon I know it but I’ll be there for my beautiful baby girl and thank you guys for all your support it means a lot to all of us

Now dreams last night I had 3 dreams Mira tried to stop them she said since I have not slept for two days a surprise dream if I sleep the first dream was I was a guard in a castle royal guard I walked into a room bowed to the king and princess  then the king says to the princess this will be your body guard your protector she said things like he does not look like he can fight I don’t need a body guard all thins the king said he has just returned from the crusades he has proven his skill in battle you could not ask for a better fighter to protect my daughter she said he looks only few years older than me I said 3 in fact then the king gave me two swords saying I heard you like wielding two swords I grabbed them they were the best swords money could buy  then it shifted she was outside the walls in a forest 3 men tried to attack her I remember running through the woods and jumped out to protect her I pulled my two swords kept her behind me I didn’t like to wear armor for some reason and I got the first guy through the neck second guy sliced him open guts spilling out the 3 guy got me down my arm I cut off his leg then stabbed him in the chest

Now she said well you can fight and we walked away till I came to a river and she cleaned my arm and asked what’s the marking on my arm now It looks just like the one Mira gave me I said I could see ever since I was 13 so I decided to ink it in my skin I feel like it means something then said we better get to the castle then I woke up

Second dream was a roman battle the enemy were running through the forest and we were chasing them it was very green beautiful in a way if we were not chasing a enemy force little wet and raining abit we came up to them the main forces stopped them and we charged from behind we were not in formation we were scattered across the forest then more blood screams guts etc then I woke up

Then last dream I was sitting in a bar or tavern whatever you want to call it same marking on my arm tattooed on that’s what I call it I don’t know how they did it back then and this man he looked noble or royal said I need to you kill someone I heard you are the best I need you in my army ill pay you a lot I said ok how much then I woke up

The vision stopped my sleep it was a flash a village was burning and the past life me monster me were talking and Mira later said I think that’s when you became the monster

That’s all my dreams the first one was interesting the princess was very beautiful but it was not English royalty it was somewhere in Europe I don’t know but that’s it Mira suspected I had more than one past life she said she was interested too in my dreams to learn where the hell I went after I died the first time

Have a good one

To my beautiful Kara

Im not good at all this this stuff but here goes

When you were born I made a promise to always be there for you and protect you from the horrors and cruelty of the world I failed at the protection part for that im sorry but I’ll always be there for you in every way a dad should be I love you Kara

These monsters took away your purity they hurt you and I don’t care if it’s this life or the next I will get you justice and these times will be tough but I’ll be there right by your side to hold you care for you look out for you I love you Kara

Kara ill do anything for you go through the depths of hell to the highest heavens I would gladly give my life for yours your breath at the cost of mine you are everything to me you are my world my salvation my hope my life I love you Kara

Kara you are tough smart very cunning and fast all those traits will get you far in your life but most of all your loving caring kind considerate you are funny goofy bit of a rebel and a lot more you fought and bit off a spirits finger mind you that’s me to howl you know something I don’t you never need to fight alone you mothers were there to help you I wish I was but now is all that matters im here for you Kara I love you Kara

I wish Kara I could take the pain you feel now away but I can’t it hurts me to see you like this but like me you are strong and will bounce back don’t let these monster take away the part of you that makes you everything you are Kara they didn’t take away your light I love you Kara

Kara you never walk alone even if im gone I’ll always walk with you I love you so much my beautiful baby Wolf my light saying I love you does not show half of how I feel you might be less than a month old but you already made an impression on your family not just blood but those who could not be there to hug you fight for you care for you now not many people can do that you are the core of this family Kara hopefully soon you will have brothers and sisters to teach them this but there will always be one Kara I love you Kara

Kara im a man who rarely cries but I cried today I felt your pain as if it was my own but even in pain you gave me the biggest smile that’s my Kara im your dad and already im so proud of you the courage you showed yet the compassion you showed to your mother who was crying nonstop shows just who you are so from dad Kara you are and always will be my beautiful baby girl I love you more than anything and would do anything for you

I love you Kara